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Social anxiety, also known as social phobia, is an intense fear of social situations. You may feel anticipatory and persistent fear of being judged or rejected. You may also experience a racing heart, nausea, and sweating, among other physical symptoms. Social phobia and anxiety can negatively impact friendships, romantic relationships, and school and work opportunities.
Seeking help through professional therapy is the most effective approach to overcoming social anxiety. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) helps people learn coping mechanisms. relaxation techniques, and tools for challenging negative thoughts to manage symptoms.
1. Seek Support
Seeking support may include making a virtual or in-person appointment with a mental health professional (counselor, psychologist, psychiatrist) for individual therapy or group therapy, attending peer support groups, or reaching out to trusted friends, family, mentors, or advisers for support.
A Word From Verywell
Specific causes of social anxiety disorder are varied, but there are known risk factors. There may be a genetic component to social anxiety disorder, as it does run in families. Environmental risk factors also play a role. These include having a parent or close family member with social anxiety disorder as well as having lived through adverse childhood experiences such as bullying, harsh discipline, and childhood trauma.
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2. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
Numerous studies have shown CBT to be effective in treating social anxiety disorder. Cognitive behavioral therapy provides practical tools for overcoming unhelpful thinking patterns and behaviors.
Social anxiety disorder is when social anxiety becomes disabling, negatively affecting your health, relationships, and school or work opportunities.
3. Relaxation Techniques
Chronic stress is linked to social anxiety, along with social withdrawal. Relaxation techniques can help ease stress. Popular examples include mindfulness and meditation.
Art therapy is another example of a relaxation technique. Research shows art therapy may reduce anxiety, enhance emotional regulation, and improve quality of life in women with social anxiety or other anxiety-related disorders.
Other techniques include:
4. Challenge Negative Thoughts
Challenging negative thoughts can help you recognize which thoughts are unhelpful, understand how thoughts and emotions influence behaviors, and learn how to reframe thoughts contributing to social anxiety. CBT was designed to challenge these thought processes and is one of the most scientifically backed treatments for stress and anxiety.
5. Identify Your Triggers
Understanding your social anxiety triggers and working to prevent them is effective and empowering. Examples include extreme and persistent fear of job interviews, giving presentations, school or work events, eating in public, or attending parties or public places. You can address your specific social anxiety triggers with your counselor so they can develop a plan to help you overcome that trigger.
6. Exposure Therapy
Exposure therapy is a desensitization technique that works by gradually exposing the person to the source of their fear or anxiety (i.e., social anxiety triggers). It’s said to be particularly effective for people with phobias, which includes social phobia and anxiety.
7. Breathing Exercises
There are many simple breathing exercises you can do when feeling anticipatory anxiety about social situations or when you’re feeling symptoms of anxiety and panic in social settings. Try simple deep breathing by taking slower, deeper breaths to reduce heart rate and blood pressure, both of which are elevated when the central nervous system responds to stress triggers.
You can also try one of the many other breathing techniques, including box breathing, pursed-lip breathing, or lion’s breath.
8. Lifestyle Changes
If there are parts of your lifestyle that are making social anxiety symptoms worse, making certain lifestyle changes can help. General lifestyle tips that help support mental health include:
- Exercising
- Practicing mindfulness
- Getting quality sleep
- Maintaining social connections
Another lifestyle change is to avoid substances contributing to anxiety. Experts say using, misusing, or withdrawing from various substances, including alcohol and certain prescription medications, can lead to anxiety disorders.
9. Be Patient With and Kind to Yourself
Social anxiety is common. Overcoming its effects on your personal and professional life takes practice and time. Still, it can feel like a lot to overcome, which can increase feelings of stress and pressure. Be patient and kind with yourself as you explore the above tips.
If you’re finding it challenging to be patient with and kind to yourself, consult a mental health provider who can offer specific strategies based on your needs, preferences, triggers, and goals.
Other Tips to Build Social Skills
Building social skills may also help you overcome social anxiety. Here are some evidence-based tips:
- Make a list of social goals in order of least anxiety-producing to most anxiety-producing.
- Make a realistic and attainable step–by-step plan to achieve your social goals.
- Reflect on your own anxiety levels, assigning numbers for lowest to highest.
- Avoid using alcohol or drugs—they give a false sense of confidence.
- Use relaxation exercises.
- Be mindful of the verbal and nonverbal cues you’re giving.
- Practice conversation starters.
Summary
Social anxiety is an intense and ongoing fear of social situations. Tips for overcoming social anxiety include seeking professional therapy, including cognitive behavioral therapy or exposure therapy, using relaxation and breathing techniques, lifestyle changes, and building social skills, among others.
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